The act of looking backward is a ghostly, impossible, and unreachable act. “Never” is an extremely short but rigorous performance. I force myself through the neon green, fuzzy, fleece, constricting tube that acts as Peter Pan’s shadow. The audience acts as witness for things that are found unnamable, unknowable, and impossible. Growing up as a queer child presents a difficulty when you have no way of explaining why you do not see yourself reflected back in the world around you. Pan does not have a shadow and possesses no way of looking backward. “Never” attempts to make present the absence or lack of shadow. By crawling through the tube, I embody Pan’s shadow or reflection as a form of bringing out what was already queer.